In the 23rd chapter of Matthew, Jesus begins to teach about hypocrisy and renders a scathing rebuke of the religious leaders of His day. In verses 25 through 28, He speaks specifically about the attention they give to the outside for appearances sake but neglect giving attention to the inside which is hidden from public view. Christ points out the hypocrisy and danger in living life in this manner.
Very often couples navigate their relationships in a similar fashion. Showing concern for and giving attention to how the couple appears to onlookers as opposed to how they really are behind closed doors where all hell may be breaking loose. I do believe that couples should always present a united front but that should be the attitude that permeates the entirety of their relationship, not only while in public. And when there are problems in a relationship one must first look within themselves to find how they contributed to the situation and what can be done differently going forward. Avoid looking to see what needs to be “fixed” in your partner. This is not to remove accountability from your partner, however, the only person you can “fix” is yourself. If each partner does this, it will make for a more peaceable and loving union. Because healthy relationships are lived from the inside out.